Monday, 8 May 2017

91 Thoughts From A Therapy Waiting Room


1. It's empty. Is that good? I spose it means I don't have to make small talk to anyone.
2. The seats are comfy. That's good.
3. It's a bit small in here. The actual room is bigger than this. You'd have thought they'd planned this better but oh well.
4. Tons of magazines. All out of date which doesn't interest me unfortunately. Why are they always out of date in clinics and surgeries?
5. I wish I'd brought a book.
6. Why did I leave so early?
7. Because I didn't want to be late or in a rush. Because I know I hate that.
8. I really wish I brought a book. I could be on chapter 3 at least before I'm called in.
9. 20 minute wait? My efficiency knows no bounds.
10. Thank God for Spotify.
11. Ooooh they have Mind leaflets on the wall.
12. They have ones for everything except the service I'm helping out with.
13. This place could use a spruce.
14. Maybe some art, a plant, something?
15. It's not exactly the most positive atmosphere to wait for 20 minutes.
16. 7/11 has just come on. *spinning while ma hand's up*
17. I don't know how Beyonce can spin for so long with her hands up. I'd give up.
18. I am that unfit though and she's her so I can't really compare can I.


19. The chairs aren't at all colour coordinated. Come on people, basic interior design.
20. I wonder if they've heard of hygge. Maybe I'll ask.
21. I'm tired now. I could've had more sleep if I'd have done this properly.
22. They have this one random picture of people walking into a wood.
23. Call me crazy but surely you'd have people walking out of them?
24. T-Swizzle didn't write that song for nothing, you know.
25. My brain is on fire today.
26. Guaranteed it won't be like this once I'm in the room.
27. Last time the dude seemed a bit shy and wary, that's not what I came here for
28. *immediately starts singing 'This is What You Came For' in my head*
29. I swear I don't normally get distracted this quickly.
30. Am I anxious? My brain doesn't think this fast normally but I don't have any butterflies.
31. Dammit anxiety. Throw another spanner in the works why don't you.
32. I actually feel mostly ok today mood wise. Hope they don't assume my whole life is the same.
33. The receptionist asked me if I needed to fill out one of those forms earlier. I hate those forms.
34. How are you supposed to tell if someone is depressed by looking at a 2-week period?
35. Poor old NHS. It's not their fault.
36. IT'S THE TORIES FAULT
37. Let's not get into this again, wrong time and place
38. I really wish I'd eaten something. I want a pastry.
39. People are talking loudly and moving around. Does this mean I'm going in soon?


40. Well someone else has just come out. Can't be long.
41. Oh she's about my age or so? She smiled at me which was nice.
42. It's nice to see people similar to me here too. Don't feel like the only one.
43. Still the only one in this room though.
44. Where is everyone?!
45. Why are the waiting lists so long when there is no one here?
46. My head is tired.
47. I could sleep for a million years.
48. Solange on Spotify is helping.
49. There is a small toy in the corner - *sneezes twice*
50. Really must remember these hayfever tablets.
51. I'm getting really tired now. Really cba with this.
52. If I come out feeling shitter, I'm getting a really good lunch for myself.
53. Mac & Cheese would go down really well right now.
54. Or that pastry.
55. OR ALL THE PASTRIES.
56. I'm not even sure what this appointment is for. Do I have to bring up everything again?
57. I really don't have the energy to.
58. Facebook is telling me it's 'someone-I-don't-talk-to's' birthday.
59. She was always nice though.


60. Think it's time to nearly go in.
61. This better go better than last time.
62. Therapy is sposed to help isn't it?
63. Wow I've managed to log all these for 15 minutes straight.
64. Go me.
65. My arms hurt.
66. This room has one of those clocks that ticks loudly.
67. Really?
68. Cos that's good for an anxious person isn't it?
69. Sometimes I think I could really help the NHS.
70. TORIES SUCK
71. Time to go now I think.
72. Butterflies have started.
73. Why am I anxious? I've done this before.
74. Mental health isn't rational, remember.
75. I really want my bed.
76. I hope it doesn't rain today.
77. *yawns*
78. I'm still tired. This is going to take some effort.
79. Can't really get away saying very little can I?
80. Even if I could I probably wouldn't knowing me.
81. When it comes to mental health I'm like a bloomin' open book.
82. I spose that's good though, right?
83. You know when you burp and you taste something?
84. I've just tasted a fruit salad sweet.
85. FROM LAST NIGHT.
86. I feel a little sick.
87. Jeez I'm gross sometimes.
88. I brushed my teeth and everything?!
89. Life is cruel.
90. Ah he's here.
91. Time to go in.

M x

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